'Whatever'

Whatever. How I hate this word. I admit I use this word as well. Guilty as charge. But I don't think I misuse it as some whom I have the unfortunate to converse with. I actually find it quite rude when this word is freely thrown around like a used blow-up doll. I truly do hate this word. I think only because I know someone who use this word whenever he is unhappy and/or uninterested on a particular topic and/or person. He will just brush it off by saying "Whatever" or "Whatever lah" or "Okay. Whatever."

Bloody b*****d. Would it kill you to be freaking civil a bit to even show some respect to the person talking as well as whatever/whoever she is talking about? Stop being a bloody freaking b***h and deal with it. You got issues with anything then spill it out but at least try to be civilise. Damnit. You know what I'm talking about.

Yes, my extreme minuscule readers. I am in a b***hy mood. Nuf said.

How?

How do you return the love someone has for you if you feel that you have no such feelings left in your heart anymore? Your heart have been broken into pieces in the past and can not put all the pieces back together. You don't believe that you can or even deserve this feeling called love and you think you're incapable to feel this feeling at all or anymore. Do you have it in the first place? You used to think love is just plain crap and now you still think that too. You used to think that you were madly deeply in love with that special someone and that love can conquer all but somehow that special someone manage to break all fantasy that you may have. You used to think with love everything will be okay and that your flaws will be accepted as how you accepted their flaws but only to realise that was all your figments of your imaginations. How do you go on with life when the pain is healed but the wound never really closed? How do you make yourself happy again? How do you regain your self-confidence to stand up on your own again? So how do you get on with life with an open heart willing to accept someone else without the fear that the same thing will happen to you again because life just loves screwing with you? How?

I don't know.